Explaining Death

A while back before we gotten our guinea pigs Wubbzy and Gizmo, there was Nemo.  Nemo died of natural causes.  That, or it was the q-tip the kids threw into the cage. Nemo ate it within a matter of seconds before I had the slightest chance of getting it out before he ate it.  It happened that fast.  I didn't realize a q-tip could be gobbled up as fast as a human can suck spaghetti noodles by a small furry animal.

After Nemo died, I have to explain that Nemo is gone.  This is about a year ago, I tell the kids that he is with Jesus.  Where's Nemo?  He's with Jesus.  In heaven.  He's in a better place.  He's up in the clouds.  He's at peace.  What do I say?

I remember my wife telling me that Dane was shaking the cage and running back into the bed room saying that, "Nemo won't wake up!'  Uh, oh.  Nemo's dead.

Recently, the kids were fighting over their new night lights for their bed rooms.  I don't know exactly what happened and Dane got really upset.  He told my wife that she died like Nemo.  Needless to say my wife was hurt and appalled. She wanted me to explain to him how that hurt her and explain death further and have him apologize.

After school, I knelt down and told him that if daddy or Grandpa died like Nemo, he would never see daddy or Grandpa again.  I told him that since Nemo died, he hasn't seen Nemo.  Nemo's gone, forever.  I told Dane that that made mommy sad.  He didn't want to apologize because he wanted to play outside. I let him play a bit.  After while, I told him again to apologize and explain why we don't talk about dying.  If someone dies, their gone.  I want to make this a simple explanation but it seems to get harder as I explain.  Eventually, he apologized.  My wife asked what his apology was for and he said, "The night light."  Wow, something clicked and he understood what the apology was for.

I was proud that he said he was sorry on his own.  I took him to one of his cousin's houses to play with someone his own age.  He rode around in their Gator and rode bike.  He had fun.  He's been cooped up in the house all week.  Finally, he get's to go outside and run.  I hope the weather warms up a bit more and stops raining.  It won't be long and winter will be here soon.  Blah.