No Easy Explanation

I feel that you really need to tell an autistic child several times about something before it happens. I try to tell my son about leaving for work and he goes through a range of emotions.

He will ask, "I come to?" To tell him that he can't go gets him really sad. He cries and walks away. A while later we will tell him again that I have to leave and that I will be back later. This time he will get angry and stomp his feet and storms off crying.

This happened again at his grandparents house. Grandma was having a dinner award for her 40 years in the factory. Grandpa had to go with, and why not, it's a free meal. Telling him that Grandpa has to leave and he can't go set him off. Sadness, anger, agitation. It's very overwhelming. It leaves me stressed trying to make him understand that he will be back. Some things he just can't do with us or his grandparents.

The time came when Grandpa was leaving for the dinner party. He didn't take it so hard at the final moments of his leaving. What a relief. I thought he would go into a tantrum and we would have to deal with that for the next hour. Maybe it was worth telling him 5 times prior leaving to not deal with him screaming. I could have dealt without the tantrums the other 4 times however.

With therapy and hope, he will eventually be able to control his emotions from what his therapists tell me. Autism is not cured but it is treated. It is not easy dealing with situations that you have no control over. Once control is regained, the bitter sweetness of happy children who we love is upon us until the next fight or meltdown. Enjoy it while you can. With fingers crossed, it will get better with each passing day.