Who would have thought that having children that cutting their hair was like pulling teeth! Metaphorically speaking of course. Literally speaking though, cutting a kid's hair when they are autistic makes them feel like their being tortured.
We have not even tried to take my son to a hair salon because he would freak out most likely. We considered "Fantastic Sams" but we changed our mind quickly after our shopping experience at Walgreens. He threw a fit and didn't want to leave the store. He ran around the aisle and was hard to catch. This was because we wouldn't let him get a new toy. We are trying to teach him that we can't buy him something everywhere we go just so he behaves.
I cut my own hair to save some dollars. In the meantime I have cut my dads and my brothers. I cut my son's just so he doesn't take out his frustration on the person cutting his hair. I don't think they would be able to handle him squirming and screaming that his hair hurts. He cries and tells me "All done!" I keep telling him, "Your doing so well. We can take a short break." One side is done and it looks like crap so I want to finish it. He does get back in the chair and it is painful to watch and clip trying not to hurt him.
I don't understand what hurts him. Is it the pulling of the clippers? I cut slow and the blades are sharp so they glide gently. Is it the buzzing noise of the clippers? Is it too loud for him? Or both? Apparently hair can be as sensitive as biting into a mouthful of frozen ice cream.
This is my online diary about my son diagnosed with autism at age 2. His progress and regressions. His behavior and his sensory overloads. Therapy and picture schedules. Drama and humor to figure out how his mind works.
Showing posts with label autistic. Show all posts
Showing posts with label autistic. Show all posts
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
Disturbing Article
I had just read a small article on the internet about a woman and her service dog along with her autistic children going into a McDonald's restaurant. The manager of that food chain walked up to the woman in the parking lot and punched her in the face. This happened in Atlanta.
Apparently the manager became disturbed about the service dog inside the restaurant. She was charged with battery, assault and disorderly conduct. Along side, she lost her job.
As if this woman having a disability and has a service dog to accompany her while raising autistic twins isn't hard enough for her. Did punching her in the face in the parking lot put the icing on the cake? WTF is wrong with people?
With the Americans with Disabilities Act that woman had her right to bring the dog inside the place.
Now, I could understand if the dog made a big dookie on the floor and she had to clean it up. I believe the article said that she was off-duty even. Really? Your not even on the clock and want to express your discontent for a customer by punching her in front of her kids. What is this world coming to?
Apparently the manager became disturbed about the service dog inside the restaurant. She was charged with battery, assault and disorderly conduct. Along side, she lost her job.
As if this woman having a disability and has a service dog to accompany her while raising autistic twins isn't hard enough for her. Did punching her in the face in the parking lot put the icing on the cake? WTF is wrong with people?
With the Americans with Disabilities Act that woman had her right to bring the dog inside the place.
Now, I could understand if the dog made a big dookie on the floor and she had to clean it up. I believe the article said that she was off-duty even. Really? Your not even on the clock and want to express your discontent for a customer by punching her in front of her kids. What is this world coming to?
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Routines
A routine I didn't mention at the early stages of my son when he was still a toddler. Before we left anywhere, he would have to jump over the seats in our vehicles, turn on the dome lights and honk the horn.
No matter what we would do, he just had to do these quirky things or he would go wild. This is before we knew he was autistic. We really didn't know what autism was at that time. We knew there was something wrong. One routine after another. After one routine starts and goes on for a while, it ends and a new one starts.
Trying to buckle him into his car seat was virtually impossible. He would kick and scream. He would have to turn on the dome lights, honk the horn and then he would be as calm as can be and get buckled in to go. We knew we didn't want him to do this all the time. When it's time to go, it's time to go now. I don't want to have to deal with fighting with my son when we want to go somewhere.
Every time though, we would have to cave in after a few minutes and make him happy just to go anywhere. Every routine had complete control over us. Until he flipped a switch, spun a wheel, honked the horn, lined toys up, etc...we let him do it just so he wouldn't throw a tantrum.
When he would tantrum they would last from 45 minutes to an hour. That was enough to bring us as parents to our knees. Screaming, kicking and crying. What were we doing wrong? I just wanted our child to be happy. If he could only talk to tell us what was wrong.
Every day is a new adventure. There are good days and they are very well appreciated. When there are bad days it is like hell on earth where anything we try to do is wrong and nothing makes him happy. I figured out though that when he is over-tired, that is when he is at his worst. That is when nothing is right and all he needs to do is nap. After a nap he is all better. Getting him to lay down for the nap or bed time is the real challenge.
No matter what we would do, he just had to do these quirky things or he would go wild. This is before we knew he was autistic. We really didn't know what autism was at that time. We knew there was something wrong. One routine after another. After one routine starts and goes on for a while, it ends and a new one starts.
Trying to buckle him into his car seat was virtually impossible. He would kick and scream. He would have to turn on the dome lights, honk the horn and then he would be as calm as can be and get buckled in to go. We knew we didn't want him to do this all the time. When it's time to go, it's time to go now. I don't want to have to deal with fighting with my son when we want to go somewhere.
Every time though, we would have to cave in after a few minutes and make him happy just to go anywhere. Every routine had complete control over us. Until he flipped a switch, spun a wheel, honked the horn, lined toys up, etc...we let him do it just so he wouldn't throw a tantrum.
When he would tantrum they would last from 45 minutes to an hour. That was enough to bring us as parents to our knees. Screaming, kicking and crying. What were we doing wrong? I just wanted our child to be happy. If he could only talk to tell us what was wrong.
Every day is a new adventure. There are good days and they are very well appreciated. When there are bad days it is like hell on earth where anything we try to do is wrong and nothing makes him happy. I figured out though that when he is over-tired, that is when he is at his worst. That is when nothing is right and all he needs to do is nap. After a nap he is all better. Getting him to lay down for the nap or bed time is the real challenge.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Humming & Flapping Arms
My son started flapping his arms and waving his hands in front of his face. I guess that we are supposed to discourage this activity. He hums and makes weird noises all the time also.
I remembered watching a 20/20 episode about a girl who was non-verbal who started to communicate at the age of 11 through typing. When asked a question, she could respond with a computer. How exciting is that a severely autistic girl taught herself how to read and write and communicate. When asking her questions, she can answer by typing one letter at a time.
Carly Fleishmann describes what it is like to be autistic.
My son bangs his head at times. I often wondered about that. She answered this and it is something to think about.
Carly says, "Because if I don't it feels like my body is going to explode. It's just like when you shake a can of coke. If I could stop it I would but it is not like turning a switch off, it does not work that way. I know what is right and wrong but it's like I have a fight with my brain over it."
About my son when he hums and flaps his arms, I found that this is what Carly had to say.
Carly: "It's a way for us to drown out all sensory input that over loads us all at once. We create output to block out input."
Watch Carly's story on 20/20 here http://youtu.be/34xoYwLNpvw
I remembered watching a 20/20 episode about a girl who was non-verbal who started to communicate at the age of 11 through typing. When asked a question, she could respond with a computer. How exciting is that a severely autistic girl taught herself how to read and write and communicate. When asking her questions, she can answer by typing one letter at a time.
Carly Fleishmann describes what it is like to be autistic.
"You don't know what it feels like to be me, when you can't sit still because your legs feel like they are on fire or it feels like a hundred ants are crawling up your arms."
"It is hard to be autistic because no one understands me. People look at me and assume I am dumb because I can't speak."
"I think people get a lot of their information from so-called experts but if a horse is sick, you don't ask a fish what's wrong with the horse. You go right to the horse's mouth."
My son bangs his head at times. I often wondered about that. She answered this and it is something to think about.
Carly says, "Because if I don't it feels like my body is going to explode. It's just like when you shake a can of coke. If I could stop it I would but it is not like turning a switch off, it does not work that way. I know what is right and wrong but it's like I have a fight with my brain over it."
About my son when he hums and flaps his arms, I found that this is what Carly had to say.
Carly: "It's a way for us to drown out all sensory input that over loads us all at once. We create output to block out input."
I don't know what made me think of this episode or how I remembered it but somehow it just crossed my mind tonight and I wanted to research it more. If you go here http://abcnews.go.com/2020/MindMoodNews/story?id=8258204&page=1 you will be able to read more on her or go to her site here http://carlysvoice.com/
Watch Carly's story on 20/20 here http://youtu.be/34xoYwLNpvw
Monday, April 18, 2011
"SELF HARM"
I don't understand the emotions involved in the autistic mind of my son. When he has his mind set on something he has to do it now or see it. When told "no" and trying to explain is like opening pandora's box. Nothing seems to calm him down. The littlest things can set him off into a meltdown.
This is where he starts to say and do things that are not normal. He is so upset that he will bite his hand and/or bang his head on the floor or hit the floor. He will say things like, "I'll break my teeth." He will put a cloth in his mouth like his shirt or blanket and pull. Why does he get so upset? Because I told him "No." There are boundaries he needs to understand and follow the rules. Just like everybody else. When he's like this I am at a total loss. I try to advert his attention to something else. Mostly the meltdown just has to run its course. After that it's a difference of night and day with what just happened.
When trying to control outbreaks like this, remain calm. The frustration you show feeds into that emotion. Even trying a stern voice doesn't help in this case. Most children can understand who is in control. You are. Keep your voice calm and try to explain "Why" to the child. I've tried this but I think my wife does a much better job. I think he can sense the frustration in my voice or something. He seems to get a grip on himself faster with her than me trying to talk him out of his anxiety.
It doesn't help much that we have to work opposite shifts and live like we are single parents. His little sister doesn't seem to help much when she pushes his buttons. She knows what's wrong and still she'll mess up his row of cars or take something he likes. Then he hits her. I hate that and I try to get control over that and explain that that makes her sad and it hurts her and I have to show him a no-hitting social story.
This is where he starts to say and do things that are not normal. He is so upset that he will bite his hand and/or bang his head on the floor or hit the floor. He will say things like, "I'll break my teeth." He will put a cloth in his mouth like his shirt or blanket and pull. Why does he get so upset? Because I told him "No." There are boundaries he needs to understand and follow the rules. Just like everybody else. When he's like this I am at a total loss. I try to advert his attention to something else. Mostly the meltdown just has to run its course. After that it's a difference of night and day with what just happened.
When trying to control outbreaks like this, remain calm. The frustration you show feeds into that emotion. Even trying a stern voice doesn't help in this case. Most children can understand who is in control. You are. Keep your voice calm and try to explain "Why" to the child. I've tried this but I think my wife does a much better job. I think he can sense the frustration in my voice or something. He seems to get a grip on himself faster with her than me trying to talk him out of his anxiety.
It doesn't help much that we have to work opposite shifts and live like we are single parents. His little sister doesn't seem to help much when she pushes his buttons. She knows what's wrong and still she'll mess up his row of cars or take something he likes. Then he hits her. I hate that and I try to get control over that and explain that that makes her sad and it hurts her and I have to show him a no-hitting social story.
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